My best girlfriend came to visit and I decided that she needed to be a Guinea Pig! Fortunately, it was a mostly pleasant experience! Her first morning here, I decided to try out an idea that had been fluttering around my busy brain, the breakfast salad! I have been wanting a healthy option for breakfast…
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Sweet Summer Centerpiece: A table scape too easy not to do!
On my way through the grocery, I saw these vibrant daisies. They were dyed and ridiculously unnatural in color. These were the kinds of cheap flowers that I would have previously mocked. Cosmo said “Get these, mom! They’re cool!”. I chuckled a little and said that they were kind of cheesy, and reached for an…
Going out with a BANG: The Swearing Mom Celebrates Independence Day!
My family is one of tradition. We always celebrated holidays in similar ways and with the same people and it was always important that we were together. The 4th of July was always a good time! Cousins, swimming, barbecue and fireworks! It doesn’t get much better than that for a kid. Having moved, we have…
Apricot Cheesecake Bars, almost as tasty as Tits n’ Ass
I LOVE cheesecake… voluptuous thighs, full round breasts and a gently swaying bouncing ass. The dessert is great too! Starting with the graham cracker crust and the perfect cracker to butter ratio. Next, the filling should be fluffy and creamy but not overly sweet. To me, cheesecake should have a bit of a tang to…
Lamb and Jam, Damned Delicious!
I have given you guys a bunch of jam recipes and one might wonder, how much jam can a family really go through? Well, I am going to begin showing you alternative uses for your jam that will not only prove useful but are going to give you little mouth-gasms in the process. There used…
The Shrub: No, I’m not talking about landscaping
A few months back, a friend of mine was talking about making a shrub. She went on to explain that it was a vinegary drink made from fruit syrup. Her husband is a lover of all things vinegar and she’s a complete natural in the kitchen. So, it was safe for me to deduce that…
Ask The Swearing Mom: Weight Loss
Hey there swearing mom, I have been struggling with this “body fat” I have, I love food and don’t normally go on the “traditional diets”. I just wanna loose the belly fat without the exercise, but don’t know where to start? Any ideas? Help! Signed, I don’t wanna diet Dear I don’t wanna!, Listen girl,…
These are a few of my favorite things: what I did with grandma’s junk
I took some of the strangest things when my Grandma passed. Some she gave to me when she was first diagnosed with cancer because she wanted to be sure that I got them. To an outsider, they would have seemed silly. An old tin pressure juicer, an old church pew, a dilapidated picture of poppies,…
Twinkle Twinkle Table Scape
Independence Day is such a fun celebration. I mean, seriously… When do we get to punctuate a day of barbecue, beverages and the general joy of gathering with our people, with freaking explosives!?!? Am I right? It’s pretty fabulous! I think we sometimes take fireworks for granted because we get them every July, and now…
Red, White and Blue Cobblerettes
You’ve probably heard of “Dump Cake” or “Cake Mix Cobbler”. It’s where you take dry cake mix, canned pie filling and butter and turn it into a delicious cobbler-esque dessert. I wanted to do a spin on this, one that would be fun to make, easy to take and is a good way to use…
Roasted Corn Crostini With Whipped Feta
I’ve been hearing about “whipped feta” for awhile now. I wanted to do something kind of different from the uses I’ve been seeing. I wasn’t quite sure what direction I would go, when my girlfriend dropped by. She had cleaned out her fridge a bit because her son was heading out to summer break with…
Ask The Swearing Mom: There’s too much porn in my marriage
When my girlfriend suggested that I do an “Ask The Swearing Mom” segment on my page, I first thought “How presumptuous it would be of me to think anyone would want my advice!” my next thought was that it might be fun! I expected to get questions about a good barbecue sauce or a fun…
The Swearing Mom's Guide To Life 